The thirty-fifth. On sociology and chicken pot pies.

Two weeks ago I attempted to make a chicken pot pie. I say "attempt" because ultimately, my only accomplishment that evening was discovering that my oven was broken.

Thinking I'd just modify my plans, I tried this:

Image 1: Not-so-bright idea

Just as an FYI, there is a reason chicken pot pies are made for oven and microwave use. They are not meant to be casseroles or stove top mixes. It did not taste good.

A week later, an appliance repairman finally made it to my complex, took a look at my oven, and determined the piece that had stopped working. Several days passed and he called to inform me that the part replacement didn't exist anymore, so he was just going to bring a new oven. (I'm not gonna lie, I danced a little bit.)

Well, when they measured for my newer, bigger, more functional oven, they did not take into account the fact that I have baseboards in my kitchen. The oven was 1/2" too wide for the space allocated between my wall and counter.

Image 2: Baseboards FTW?

The appliance guy just left it like this in my apartment. He said he'll be back sometime this week with either a plan to rip out my baseboard (with my landlord's permission) or another small oven. And I know it's not a big deal, but I'm legitimately upset about this. I'm frustrated that I have an oven I can't use in the middle of my kitchen and that instead of leaving me with that one, they might bring back another small oven that looks kind of like a toy. What is my problem??

For the past two years, I haven't even had an oven to call my own. It was definitely not considered a "necessity". But after having one for the past semester, suddenly it's a huge inconvenience to be limited to a microwave.

Karl Marx outlined four premises of history in The German Ideology, and this situation speaks wonderfully to the first two. The first premise was that we produce what is necessary to satisfy our basic needs (there would be no history if we could not produce food for our survival). The second is that once the first needs are satisfied, they create a whole new set of needs (for example, a fork is suddenly a "need" as well as the food that warrants its use).

A year ago, an oven was an amenity, not a basic need.
I have become incredibly spoiled.

And maybe I'm not the only one.

So there's some food for thought. (Pun intended.)

Entry thirty-four: signs.

Today I realized that yield signs are not clear. When two lanes are merging into one and you see a yield sign, you know instinctively to slow down if someone is in the lane next to you (or speed up, whichever you prefer). My beef isn't with the concept of a yield sign. I actually think the signs themselves are a good idea. My problem is in the orientation of the sign. Clearly, the upside down triangle is deceitful.

Exhibit A:
Normal Yield Sign

On street signs, we have been socialized to understand that an upward arrow means "forward" and a down arrow means "where you are right now". The upside down triangle characteristic of the yield sign is misleading; it is telling us that we will have more space ahead, which is the OPPOSITE of the truth.

Then you get crazy people who think signs like this are a good idea:

Exhibit B:
Yield Ahead (Just an FYI) Sign

I just don't understand. Flip the triangle. It isn't that difficult. There is no need for a yellow sign which contains multiple images. If you flip the triangle, it becomes the arrow.

People need to chill out with their sign-age.

(Inspired by Google search, illustrated by Kris.)

33: In which I break the blog title rule and a barista breaks a social rule.

I am mildly insulted that today my Starbucks barista assumed I wanted my latte nonfat. I'm not trying to be super sensitive, but this is the third time someone has made that assumption. Different people every time. Different stores every time. I clearly say what kind of latte I want, and then they call it out and add that I want it nonfat. I don't even like milk that much, let alone if it's watery skim milk. I just feel this is an assumption that should never be made, because I don't feel comfortable correcting their mistake. What would I say? "No, please, I want the extra calories; I'm clearly not dieting if I'm at your coffee shop." I mean, I could say that, but I wouldn't because then I'd really feel terrible about myself.

If I am going to spend more than $1 on a cup of coffee, I want to make it count. Did you think I was going for a healthy meal when I ordered a slice of coffeecake to compliment my chai? But alas, I am now committed to a watered-down coffee experience, because YOU have made me feel uncomfortable about wanting the real deal.

The psychological aspect of this situation fascinates me.

Treinta y dos

I wrote in July that I'm not a "crier". And I wasn't lying; up to that point in my life, that was a true statement. It makes me laugh now, because sometime within the last six months that changed. And that's okay. It's just an odd thing to have to get used to. Somehow though, I feel more human, more real, as a result of this change.

Something that constantly amazes me is how much music can affect you. Some of the most beautiful music I've ever heard both heals my heart and solicits tears. In the past, I spent a lot of time avoiding beautiful music because of the emotional component. I'm starting to appreciate it more. Although it requires more of my emotional energy, there is so much more substance and depth, it's worth it.

In the past few days I've played my piano more than in the past few years. Or maybe ever. I hope this isn't a short-term kick. I really want this to continue. If I can't have silence in a physical manner, at the very least it quiets my mind.

"Without music life would be a mistake." - Nietzche

Treinta y uno

I love the Christmas season. I love lights, trees, and finding the perfect gift for people. I've decided to dedicate this blog to the reasons why I love Christmas. I am not going to slap a bunch of disclaimers on my preferences--I simply love to love Christmas.

Christmas lights.
Maybe it's my fixation with shiny things... maybe it's the beautiful way they glow in the evening light... but you'd be hard-pressed to find something I'd rather do than go see Christmas lights in December. I fully intend to be one of those households that out-shines everyone else in the neighborhood, not because I'm trying to be a jerk, but because I love Christmas lights that much. It's hard not to smile when you drive by a house that really put some effort into decorating.

Christmas at Starbucks.
December is the only time of year that I am consistently willing to spend money on fufu coffee. The Peppermint Mocha Latte is Christmas in a cup, and I cannot be sad when I am drinking this coffee. The day before one of my exams this month I decided to get a coffee before diving into an intense afternoon of studying. What actually happened was I took a sip of the coffee and proceeded to put on Christmas music and spend the entire afternoon decorating my apartment. Time well spent? I think so. (I also passed the exam with flying colors, so there's that.)

Christmas music.
From the classic Christmas carols to the new renditions of old favorites, I can't help but love Christmas music. It just makes my heart happy. My favorite is "Carol of the Bells". This is partially because it was a tradition to sing it at our Christmas concert every December in choir and partially because it has so much going on and there are so many versions of it. It's impossible to become bored with that song. (Note: I cannot stand the song "Feliz Navidad". I have no idea why, but it annoys the living daylights out of me... which seems silly because I love Spanish so much.)

Christmas trees.
I'm not sure if its the tree itself or the decorating that I love more, but the finished product is so beautiful I can't help but feel at home when a Christmas tree is in the room. Pulling out the boxes of ornaments and deciding which to put on a tree appeals to the organizational side of me, and the aesthetic appeal of the finished product never fails to light up a room. It's like a 3-D collage of memories. I recently changed my formerly-negative opinion about artificial trees and although I love the smell of evergreen, I like the idea of being able to design everything about a tree right down to where you want the branches. Also, artificial trees come with lights. Win.

Christmas desserts.
I don't think this needs much explaining. Baking becomes infinitely more fun around Christmas time, and baking for the sake of giving the baked goods to other people is my favorite. I can make delicious treats simply because I love to and then give them to other people who will love eating them. Everyone wins with Christmas cookies and fudge.

Christmas presents.
My philosophy on gift-giving has changed a lot over the years. I no longer create a list of people for whom I am obligated to find gifts. Instead, I remain open to the possibility of giving presents to everyone, provided that I have an idea that is clever, ironic, or specific to that individual. Essentially, my gift-giving must be intentional. One of the many positives to this philosophy is that girls will never receive a generic bath set from me (unless you tell me a fragrance you like or I think it's really what you want). One of the negatives to this philosophy is that my gift-giving is inconsistent; just because you receive a wildly appropriate present this year does not mean you get one next year. It isn't because I don't love you; it's because I love you enough not to get you something for your junk drawer. I also would like to make it abundantly clear that I don't want things for my junk drawer either, so my anti-obligatory stance on presents goes both ways. Just send me a greeting card. I love greeting cards.

Ultimately, I have decided that I am okay with the commercialization of Christmas. December 25th wasn't Jesus' birthday, so I don't always think of it that way. Thinking about Christ should happen throughout the year, so I am personally not offended that Christmas has been transformed with some odd traditions. I just see it as a season with more spirit than the rest of the year, and each year I hold onto that spirit as long as I can. I haven't bought into the materialistic idea that presents=how much you love people, but I do like to make people happy. Looking for ways to brighten people's days and serve them is a good thing. It's a Christ-like thing. And I find that there are lots of out-of-the-ordinary ways to do that around this time of year... so maybe that's where Jesus fits into the picture. Maybe it is possible for Him and the over-commercialized Christmas traditions to coexist. Maybe it's just about joy.

I know it doesn't make sense to put lights on the outside of my house, Jim Gaffigan, but sometimes it's okay to just want things to be pretty.

Treinta

Tip of the Day:

Do not begin putting change into a parking meter unless you are 100% sure you have enough money to buy the amount of time needed to last the duration of your classes.

So Merry Christmas to whoever reaped the 1 hour 20 minute benefit of my failed parking attempt.

I'd like to know who decided that ten minutes should cost me a quarter. What a jerk.

Veintinueve

A good friend of mine once compared women to spaghetti and men to waffles. Women, she said, are always thinking something. There is never a time when their minds are empty. Men, she continued, are capable of not thinking about anything, as exemplified by the squares in the waffle that don’t end up with syrup.

Several days ago, I was doing my dishes around 1 AM (you know, about the time your fine motor skills quit working) and I broke my coffee maker. There are only a few pieces that go into the filter-containing-apparatus, but I could not for the life of me figure out how to get it back together. I went to sleep somewhat frustrated and thought, “I’ll tackle this in the morning.”

Well, Morning Kris didn’t know how to fix it either. Thus began a week of far-too-costly-campus-brewed coffee.

Last night, I went to sleep again thinking about my coffee maker. (Is that sad?)

And—I kid you not—I dreamed how to fix it. Subconscious Kris managed to correctly assemble the pieces. I woke up and was like, “Oh, duh!” and promptly went into my kitchen, fixed it, and brewed coffee.

I am not joking when I say my mind does not rest.

Veintiocho

Had you asked me prior to today whether I thought restrictions on the sale of alcohol were a good idea, I would have probably said yes. However, having experienced the enforcement of a blue law at Safeway this morning, my answer has changed. Allow me to explain.

No one remembered the elements for communion this morning. We brought in the equipment, started getting things set up, and realized we had no bread or wine. Problematic, you might say. I don't know how to set up sound equipment very well anyways, so I volunteered to make a quick run to buy some pita bread and wine. (Keep in mind that the wine we use is alcohol free.)

I drove like a maniac to the store, ran in, spent a few minutes frantically looking for the wine, grabbed some pita bread, and made a quick break for the self-check-out. I scanned the bottle of wine (which, again, is ALCOHOL FREE), and the screen said "Item is not for sale". I didn't understand. The item had to be for sale--it was in the aisle and it had a bar code! Safeway associates had helped me locate said bottle! It was clearly for sale!

The cashier who was supervising the self check-out came over and informed me that they can't sell alcohol until 10 am. It was 9:15. "But it's alcohol free!" I protested. "And church starts at 10:30!" She grabbed the bottle of wine, turned on her heel, and walked away. I was stunned.

How is there not an exception to the blue laws for items that clearly say ALCOHOL REMOVED on the label? How did that get through the system??

I do find it ironic that the laws that were originally implemented for religious reasons were somewhat of a hindrance to church today.

Veintesiete

Some things never change.

It has just occurred to me that perhaps practices between generations are more consistent than we think.

Styles don't really change, they just sort of rotate. Who ever thought platforms would be in style more than once? Thank you, Spice Girls.

Music is always changing, but it seems like just as a new genre is created, another classic rock band gets their second wind.

You get the point.

Now, Homecoming weekend brings a lot of alumni to the U of A campus. Our school is quite old, thus so are some of our alumni. Two elderly ladies stopped by the dorm tonight to take a look at their former residence hall. Amidst the reminiscing, they told me about how they once went to Mexico and bought a bag that was just the right size and shape to hide a six pack of beer, and that's how they smuggled alcohol into the building.

Ahh, college life. It's funny to think that the things teens and twenty-somethings attempt to do today have already been successfully accomplished by their grandparents.

Veintiséis

Reasons why registering for classes is far too difficult:

1. Not enough sections.
One class everyone in the major has to take... one section. Ridiculous.

2. Not enough seats.
Only 35 seats in that one section? Come on.

3. Faculty members are being fired.
No wonder we can't find classes--there's no one to teach them.

4. The registration system crashes constantly.
They never seem to anticipate the volume of students who need to register at one time.
There are over 30,000 of us. Please be better prepared.

5. There is no alternate registration option.
And the online system always seems to fail in one way or another.

6. People register for classes they don't need.
You know, "just in case" they change their mind later.

7. Days/times for classes aren't finalized until the day before registration.
And they try to teach us to plan ahead.

8. THEY CHANGE PRIORITY REGISTRATION DATES AT THE LAST SECOND.

Reasons why registering for classes should not be this difficult:

*ahem*

1. Tuition costs an obscene amount of money each semester.
Where has it all gone?
Stop re-potting the flowers and re-hire some professors, please.

The end.