Siete

In the 3 1/2 years I have owned my 1996 pick-up truck, I haven't had any major problems with it... You guessed it--until today!

So my truck won't start. It sounds like it wants to, but then shuts off. "Yeah, Kris, I'll start up like normal... wait... almost... JUST KIDDING!" In explaining what was wrong to my dad, who is technically the owner of the vehicle, I actually said, "Dad, it's teasing me--it has no real intention of starting!"

That's when I realized that I need to take an automotive class of some sort, because today I was totally useless. (I did pop my hood successfully... only to realize I had no idea what I was looking at.) I also realized today that I haven't spent much time befriending mechanics the past few years. Bad choice on my part.

I think the best part of this whole situation is that when I parked my truck, I parked in a space on the ramp of the parking garage and the guy next to me was crooked, so I had to park crooked as well... so now, since the other guy is gone, I'm the awkward crooked truck in the garage... and I can't fix it... and there is a good chance we're going to have to push it out to get it towed. ("We" being the four or five people I will recruit to help me.)

I laugh as I picture the fiasco this could turn out to be. Oh my.

"I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose." - Woody Allen

Seis

Tonight I am going to type a vague rant about politics. At the end of it, you will probably not be any more informed of my opinions. This is deliberate, because my main "opinion" is that you should form some of your own. As a voter and U.S. citizen, having opinions is healthy, I promise.

I am uninterested in what the media says about John McCain and Barack Obama.
I-DO-NOT-CARE what the CNN political analysts think about the rhetorical strategies employed by either candidate.
I care what our next president is going to do with the four years he is given to get our country out of this mess.

And really, that might be setting the bar darn near impossible, because our mess is BIG... so we have to decide which issues are MOST important to us and which candidate MOST reflects our own beliefs and values.

I am sick and tired of being patronized as a voter. I am sick and tired of people simply repeating things that the popular news stations feed us on a daily basis. (If I wanted to hear the news anchors' opinions, I'd turn on the TV more often.) The fact of the matter is, no matter how many Facebook stati you devote to either candidate, it will not influence my opinion of them. No matter how much you say people aren't "qualified" to lead our country (as a president or vice president), it will not entice me to ask, "Why aren't they qualified? Please educate me so that I may share in your views." Because really, we don't know if they will make a good president until they get to the White House. Unfortunately, it isn't a position that offers an internship.

Researching the issues at hand in this election is not a difficult task. It ticks me off to no end when people who are qualified to vote either A. Don't vote (because for some unknown reason, our country's future isn't a priority) or B. Vote on things they don't take the time to understand (because for some unknown reason, our country's future isn't a priority).

I am not gifted with understanding politics by any means. I have never had the opportunity for my opinion to count. But now I do. And because I think that our Commander-In-Chief is an important person, I am going to vote. And I am going to make an effort in the next few weeks to understand what is going on, because it will directly affect me for the next four years.

I am not going to vote for who you tell me is "awesome" or for who comes out on top in those bicker-sessions they call "debates". I am going to vote for the person I believe most reflects my ideals and will be a strong leader for our country.

Then, when something goes wrong (as it inevitably will), I will have earned my right to complain. I feel like the people who are too apathetic to vote should be committed to that apathy through that president's term. No complaining. You didn't care at election time, don't start caring when they screw up.

Our candidates are working towards the same goal: to better our country. They have different ways to go about it, but it's not like one of them is trying to run the United States into the ground. (Duh.)

In the 2004 election, 221,256,231 people were of the age to vote.
In the 2004 election, 174,800,000 people were registered to vote.
In the 2004 election, 122,294,978 people showed up to vote.
Are you kidding me?
http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0781453.html

Cinco

I am a good waitress.
I am not a good chef.
Or fry cook.
Or even microwave-oven-user on some days.

One of my goals this year was to cook one new dish every week in an effort to save money and develop some experience with cooking.

I have friends who were high school sweethearts. They dated for three years and got married after their first year of college. In discussing why I needed to learn how to cook, we concluded that since I didn't find my husband prior to my adult years, I am now required to have skills of some sort. A lack of kitchen knowledge could cost me. (And really, it isn't so much a lack of knowledge that I currently suffer from, it's a fear of failure and poisoning people.)

The dorm got a new stove today. I feel like I can take part of the credit for the new stove, because I put a suggestion in the suggestion box every time I worked for a few weeks. Also, suggestions that weren't mine were probably incited by me.

Thus, my quest to become a more well-rounded individual and gain basic adult skills continues.

Cuatro

I don't like fortune cookies. I only get them for the joy of finding the tiny slip of paper hidden inside.

Today, there was no fortune in my fortune cookie.

I have lost all faith in Panda Express and Asian cuisine.

(Later) Edit: Roommate spent 10 minutes digging through her purse just now. (I had no idea what she was doing.) Eventually she pulled out a fortune. :)

"Be assertive when decisive action is needed." Well, sure.

Tres

I apparently live in sketchville.

Roommate and I decided to go to Pita Pit for dinner tonight, because she hadn't been there before and that is unacceptable for any Tucson resident.

While sitting outside enjoying our [delectable] pitas, a homeless man walked by and asked if we had any spare change. This is not an uncommon situation--I'm pretty accustomed to it by now--but I rarely carry cash. I apologized and said no, and he went on his way.
Walking back to campus, we passed a man talking on his phone. He quickly hung up and stopped us, saying, "Hi ladies--can I ask you something?--What is a good present I can get for my five year old neice? It's her birthday tomorrow." Roommate and I looked at each other, both a little confused. We gave him a few suggestions and awkwardly tried to walk away. As we were leaving, he told Roommate that she looks a lot like his sister. Admittedly, strange.
Roommate and I continued walking down University. We were back on campus and about halfway to the union when a large man in a G-Unit shirt stopped us. He said, "Enjoy your Friday night of giving" or "Enjoy your Friday night, forgive me." We couldn't decide which would be creepier, or what on earth he was talking about. This guy was huge--at least 250 lbs and 6'1"--so we didn't really want to perpetuate the conversation... We said nothing, continued walking, and picked up the pace.
Sidenote: Roommate is from Happy Jack, AZ. In HJ, you are more likely to encounter a bear than a G-Unit. She is still unsure how to react to tonight's events.
So we are inside the union, thinking all of this stranger danger nonsense is over, when ANOTHER man, who had been peering inside the glass doors, poked his head inside the union, and yelled, "Hey! You girls got boyfriends?!" "We sure do!" I yelled back, in the manner my reflexes tell me I should respond to creepers. Roommate said nothing and we walked briskly away.

I busted out the pepper spray on the way back to the dorm. And then I realized that it was windy, so if I had to spray someone, it was going to end up in my eyes.

This happened over the course of 30 minutes.

Dos

After being in Peru this summer, I felt pretty comfortable with Spanish. I might even have gone so far as to say I was relatively "fluent"...

Portuguese has destroyed that.

But I received an email forward that put some perspective on my situation; at least I'm not learning English as my second or third language.

--

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
Neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England .
Quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
In which your house can burn up as it burns down,
In which you fill in a form by filling it out,
And in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And, in closing, if Father is Pop,
how come Mother's not Mop?

--

So, in conclusion, I am glad English was my first language, I will promptly begin calling my mother "methren", and Brian Regan* is hilarious.

*Look up his comedy sketch about school.

Uno

Today I avoided all homework-related options.

I accomplished this by installing Skype, creating a blog, and convincing Roommate (whose real name is Sarah, but who I will probably refer mostly to as "Roommate") and her friend to make smoothies while I was at the desk.

I also bought some clothing so I can make it until next week without doing laundry... which doesn't make financial sense at the moment, but time-wise it was a great decision. When I arrived at college last year, I didn't have enough clothing to get me through much more than a week, but through strategic shopping I have solved that problem. I hope to have an even more sustainable wardrobe as time wears on.*

I haven't got a lot to say today. I'm avoiding multiple reading assignments. For all I know, this might be my first and last blog. We shall see!

*Disclaimer: I do not typically enjoy shopping, but today, I had to take one for the team. (There is no team. I am the team.)